040909 - Here we go again

haven't blogged in over a month! this is a disaster.
I really intended to write a lot more
and to be creative more often.

I have lost interest in blogging through this medium ever since I got a tumblr account. It's just so much easier ..

I'm seriously considering dropping this blog. but then what about all my old entries? will they just disappear.

well, that's kind of what I want to happen with my life right now so is that really a bad thing? I think not.

I miss things. lots of things. If you asked me to recall what I miss, I just my cry again.

022709 - life is good, well, sometimes.

Location: Alter Hall Mac Lab
Listening: Gabe Bondoc - Life, Love, Everything
Current Mood: Overwhelmed, like usual.

I just finished taking my Theology Midterm. I think it went well. I will be surprisingly surprised if I don't get an A.

I am finally all caught up on the Bachelor. I have been watching episodes online and I have to say that my favorite is Melissa. In my opinion, she would be a better fit for not only Jason but Ty. I have a deep, vested interest in the outcome of this series. If Jason chooses Molly, I actually think I might cry.

So Spring Break officially starts now! I am about to go home and just .. I haven't decided yet, but I will probably either sleep .. or .. ? well, sleep it is I guess. I have no official plans for this week. Any suggestions?


I have gotten back into song writing. Remembering that time in my life when I used to write three, four songs a day - I miss it. It's very therapeutic and I am glad that I am getting back into it. I want to also get back into pleasure reading. I love reading. I seriously need to do more things that I love.

Things I love:
hanging out with friends
winning .. stuff
conditioning my hair
talking to my family
talking to God
pen-palling with people from all over the world
keeping in touch with old friends
making lists
finding raw musical talent
going to concerts
studying in coffee shops
reading for fun


Lent is upon us:
No complaining
No worries
No discouragement
No curse words
No gossip

so far, the hardest lenten promise is giving up curse words. I didn't realize how bad it had gotten, for me personally. No complaining is also hard one. Just from two days of Lent, I have found out that I also like to complain and cuss. Hmm, way to go Crystal.

022409 - Anyone else?

I just watched the new Taylor Swift video for White Horse.
is anyone else disappointed that the lyrics were revised?
I just heard the tweaks and was surprised.
I like surprises, but I did not like that one.

oh tay tay.

022409 - Love Love, it ain't love

"can we just put this behind us?"
don't say that again.
move out of my way
so I can leave this behind us.


CHORUS.
I can't stand the way you stand there
I don't think you thought to think of me
and I am sure that you are not
so baby baby, love love
shut up.

I would ask politely
but we all know how that would go
I say please, you don't hear me
and I tried yelling and screaming
who cares who cares?
I don't
anymore.

this isn't about me,
it's always about you
you never really cared.
but who are you without me
I don't care.

et tu? ET TU?

I think it's time for bed.

oh, I have a tumblr account now: CRYSonline

020809 - insert witty title here

I'm trying to not be so angry about things that are not that important.

for your reading pleasure:

I thought I bought shoes that fit
but I found them two sizes, too big
and I guess you heard me say hello
but I guess I meant goodbye
these days
pretending is just exhausting
I thought I was able to fix this
to repair something that was broken
but I guess sometimes things are broken forever.

forever never seems to last as long
an empty glass can't be full
what can possibly be lucky about a rabbit's foot?
I would probably blame me
for everything that has happened.

I wanted to talk to you the other day
but you left me with the tv on
I remember when you used to make time for me
and want to talk to me
our relationship's quieter than a library

I hope you don't read this
and think it's about you,
that's not what I want.

020709 - rethinking everything there is to rethink

I can't even begin to describe how livid I am with certain people. I hate her. I HATE her. I don't think I have ever said that I have hated someone, but I absolutely do not like anything about her.

she is one person to my face, and then another person behind my back. SUCK MY LEFT TIT you little biddy.

I can't believe I considered her anything friendly. hate this whore.

UGH, I can't stand this place. I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE.

hahahaha. wow, you suck so much. I'm so mad at you, how could you do that?! You didn't even ask me! you didn't even want to know how I felt about the situation. You don't tell me anything anymore, I feel like I'm fishing around for a friendship that's just not there anymore.

call me when you've grown a head.


*end emo post.


I love music by Gabe Bondoc.
youtube.com/gabebondoc

also, I don't think I'm going anymore. I don't want to go anymore. I'm over it.

013009 - New Year = new outlooks

so this new year has brought many things. Here are my new thoughts (in no particular order):

Don't always expect your friends to always be there for you. Things happen. And when they're not there for you, don't be so angry. You're not always there for yourself but you still love yourself right?

People will let you down. When they do, don't worry about it because every time they've let you down, they can always let you down one more time. Look at it as another chance to use forgiveness.

Take things easy. No matter what happens, the sun will always rise and set. The moon and stars will come out at night and everyday is someone's birthday.